Sometimes.....

There is nothing worse than having the satisfaction of knowing you were wrong.  Sometimes you want something bad, really bad.  And time passes, and you keep wanting.  So you begin to develop ideas of how it might be to have what you want.  Playing with all the do's and don'ts of your desire.  And, sometimes, eventually, you get it.  But sometimes it isn't at all what you wanted.  Or you wanted it, but not like it came to you.  Like getting to finally have that Ferrari you always wanted parked in your garage, except you can never drive it.  and so, Sometimes, you just have to say fuck it.  Live under your desires.  Cut off what you really want.  Breath in the poisoned air.  And then you might ask yourself,  do I still really want it?  Sometimes, just sometimes, I would have to say that I do.
How can you tell yourself not to jump at what you crave for?  How can you take someone else's advice when you know in your own mind that what they're saying doesn't fully apply to your situation?  You simply can't.  Because being human won't let you.  And if you can, then you've reached some level of enlightenment.  Congrats.  But that little spoiler wont stop you from regretting.  Nothing can.  Because if you hold no regrets, then anything you've ever lost was never valuable to you.  And that's the truth of the matter.  When you lose something you love more than yourself,  you will regret, and if nothing at all, you'll at least regret lost time.  Because that's something we are all losing to.

Fuckshit,

Corey


Oct 18, 2005